Using a child as a pawn in a relationship is one of the worst forms of manipulation. Commonly, a divorced couple may have bad blood and ill feelings towards each other, but the goal should be to see to the child’s needs and happiness.
This is not always the case, as the child may be forced to choose which parent to stay with and even which one to love through acts of brainwashing, which are known as parental alienation. It is a form of child abuse and manipulation of mind-controlling games that hurt the child and the alienated parent. We hope you’ll contact us at Trap Law, LLC if you need help!
Examples of Parental Alienation
There are several examples of parental alienation against a father or a father turning a child against the mother. One of the most common is to fill the child’s head with lies saying that the other parent doesn’t want them or love them anymore. They may also alter the child’s attention to other things instead of letting them visit the other parent.
Badmouthing is another way to brainwash a child into manipulating them into thinking the alienated parent is no good or dangerous. In some situations, they may even tell the entire truth about what happened in the divorce, which the child has no business knowing. It should stay between the parents only.
In other situations, a parent may try to use the child as a messenger or spy. They may threaten the child if they don’t follow their sadistic wishes.
Different warning signs shoot up red flags if a child is being manipulated into being a pawn for the alienator. The most common symptom is the child not wanting anything to do with the targeted parent. In some cases, they may even become aggressive and rebel.
What to Do About Parental Alienation Against a Mother or a Father
There are three primary things a targeted parent can do if they suspect being alienated after they’ve worked with a divorce attorney and gone through with a separation.
Keep Records
Documentation and keeping track of times, dates, places, and what happens is critical to battling against child manipulation. The documents will stand as legal evidence in court and protect your rights as a parent who is being victimized by parenting alienation. There are things a child should not know, so everything that is both true or false slander should be noted in detail.
Things to write down are, what you said, what the kids said, how they reacted, how the relatives or friends reacted, any suspicions, and any other evidence that presents itself.
Other good things to use are emails, text messages, and getting a witness you can trust if phone calls or face-to-face meetings occur. Phone calls and conversations can be tough to prove, so a reliable source for testimony should always be present. Some alienators will go to the extreme and post their badmouthing sessions on social media, which is also valuable evidence and proof needed to state your case.
The final thing to document well is how you reacted to the situation because the other party will try to say you responded poorly, which could have your evidence thrown out in court.
Seek Legal Representation
Family lawyers handle many cases such as these. They know the law and will follow it to deliver what is best for the child. They will know how to handle the situation and what to expect in and out of court. Attorneys know and understand that courts see alienation as child abuse.
It is not a physical abuse situation, but on the emotional side, it is considered abuse by a form of control. This kind of abuse can cause a lifelong effect that cannot be reversed. Abuse is not only using the child for the alienating parent’s goals, but it is teaching the child that this kind of behavior is acceptable when it is not. They may grow up thinking it is the right thing to do in future situations. Some may start following it as early as teenagers and doing it to others.
The attorney will offer legal advice and take the case if they see they can help. It will take thorough communication and understanding between the client and the attorney on every detail possible.
The attorney will take all the evidence, witnesses, and documentation and build the narrative for the case. They will speak on the alienated parent’s behalf outside the courtroom and try to come to an agreement with the other parent causing the trouble. They will represent the targeted parent in court if that doesn’t work.
Research, Research, and More Research
Researching all the information and legal dos and don’ts is essential to understanding what you are facing or about to face in court. It is critical to know that the child will not be on trial but may serve as a witness through a counselor or therapist. The court will hear the findings and discoveries through their statements and testimony.
Through research, you will know what you want the outcome to be. If it is custody of the child, you may receive custody because the domicile parent was found toxic because of the brainwashing and manipulation strategy. The attorneys will conduct their research through previous cases, but nothing is more valuable than doing your own research. It will also lead you to another advocate for the dilemma: the Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service (CAFCASS). They are there to develop a report on their findings for the courts that will work in your favor.
Finding a Therapist
Depending on how bad the situation is, a family therapist can help build a relationship between a targeted parent and the child. It would be in the best interest of both parties to build back something that is broken and in need of mending. Or you may need the help of a child custody attorney to determine a course of action.
Contacting Trapp Law, LLC
Child manipulation is not something to let linger. If you suspect you are being alienated and your child resents you after a separation or divorce, contact Trapp Law, LLC for an evaluation and consultation today.